“Hot dog Jokes”
Hot Dog Jokes: Got any good ones?
E-mail them to: Mike@HotDogBook.com
ECHOES FROM THE LUNCH WAGON
“‘Tis dogs’ delight to bark and bite,”
Thus does the adage run.
But I delight to bite the dog
When placed inside a bun.
Q: What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it?
A: A “hollow-weenie!!”
Two guys immigrate to America. On their first day off the boat
they are wandering around New York City seeing the sights. As lunch
time approaches they decide they are hungry. They then come up to a
street vendor selling hot dogs.
One says to the other in a shocked tone, “My God. Do they eat dogs in America?”
“I don’t know!” says the other, equally appalled.
“Well,” says the first, “we’re going to be Americans, so we must do as they do.”
They approach the vendor bravely. “Two hot dogs, please.”
The vendor hands them their food in a pair of paper sacks. The two immigrants
sit on a park bench to eat their lunch. One looks inside his sack, hesitates and
turns to his partner and says, “Uh, which part of the dog did you get?”
A hotdog walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The bartender replies, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”.
A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces, “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”
Q: What do get when you cross a chili pepper, steam shovel, and a Chihuahua?
A: A hot, diggety dog.
What does a man consider a seven-course meal?
A hot dog and a six pack of beer.
THE HOT DOGS
Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says to the other, “I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs. “Odd,” her companion replies, “but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do.” Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk towards the cart. “Two dogs, please,” says one. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige and he wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the nuns hurry over to a bench and begin to unwrap their ‘dogs. The mother superior is first to open hers. She begins to blush and then, staring at it for a moment, leans over to the other nun and whispers cautiously, “What part did you get?” HEE-HEE!!!
Knock Knock who’s there? Lettuce… Lettuce who? Lettuce in and we’ll tell you!
Knock Knock who’s there? Orange… Orange you glad I didn’t say Lemon?
Mommy and Daddy hot dog walking down the street with their little hot dog in tow, dad looks back to the little one and says………………………. Ketch-up!
Two cannibals on an Island, eat a clown……
One looks to the other and says “Did that taste Funny to you?”
What has 100 teeth and eats wieners?
So the Zen master steps up to the hot dog cart and says: “Make me one with everything.”
The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen master, who pays with a $20 bill. The hot dog vendor puts the bill in the cash drawer and closes the drawer.
“Where’s my change?” asks the Zen master. And the hot dog vendor responds: “Change must come from within.”
There was this American tourist in Mexico, and he was getting tired of walking around, so he went up to a donkey rental place and said, ”Can I rent a donkey?’
The guy said, “We don’t call them donkeys here, we call them asses. This is the only ass I have left, and you have to scratch him when you want to make him stop.”
The guy rides his ass for a while, sees a hotdog stand, and asks for a hotdog. The vendor replies, “We don’t call them hotdogs here we call the wieners.”
Meanwhile his donkey is wandering away, so he goes up to another tourist and says “Will you hold my wiener while I scratch my ass?”
The Hotdog Episode – Bad One, but funny.
Two drunks were sitting on a street corner wondering if they
should buy a beer with their last dollar. One of the drunks
suggested that they buy a hotdog. The other started bitching,
complaining that he couldn’t drink a hotdog. The other drunk
told him his idea.
“What we do is buy a hotdog, go into a bar, and order two
drinks. After we drink our beers you drop down to your knees,
and I’ll unzip my pants and pull out the hotdog so you can suck
on it. The bartender will throw us out thinking we’re queers.”
The other drunk thought this was a great idea, so they bought a
hotdog. They went into the first bar, ordered their drinks, and
drank them quickly. Then the drunk dropped to his knees and
started to suck the hotdog. Sure enough, the bartender kicked
them out thinking they were queer.
They hit about ten or fifteen bars when the first drunk started
to complain about his knees hurting. He asked if in the next bar
the other drunk would do the dirty work. The second drunk
said, “I’d rather not. I lost the hotdog after about the fifth
Joe goes to a small hot dog/hamburger stand that has been recommended to him by his buddies at work…he orders a hamburger…
Joe took a few bites and MMMMMMMMM he thought this hamburger was the best and calls over the cook..
“This is a great hamburger… how did you cook it?” Joe asked ..
“I cooked it in my armpit,” the cook said.
OMG.. thought Joe… then the cook said, “If you liked the hamburger, you should see how I cook the HOT DOGS!”
Please e-mail your Hotdog Jokes to Mike@hotdogbook.com